This one truly goes out to all the busy mums who plan and still wish they had more hours in the day.
Think of how many times you have caught yourself saying “I don’t have enough time”.
It feels that way doesn’t it? All of the extracurricular activities, homework, and the tiny humans that require food and water. Not to mention another element, when the mum works an additional job – corporate or at home. We are busy mums ready to constantly plan, align schedules, check calendars; but with good reason – we are seriously badasses that keep things running smoothly. Even if you do run late every now and then, you still qualify for the title. We as mums are running in the hamster wheel of “controlled chaos” – every damn day.
Now – let me ask you this.
How much of that time is scheduled for you? Just. You.
While we possess super powers in keeping everyone – for the most part – on schedule and taken care of; when are we taking care of ourselves?
I recently had to ask myself this question. Feelings of defeat and overwhelm started to creep into my mind. All the kiddos were taken care of, my husband was okay; hell even the dog was okay; but was I? How many times have I said the phrase “I don’t have enough time”? Oh man. Reality check.
There have been quite a few things I have put on the back burner for myself simply because I believed to my core I didn’t have enough time. There are 24 hours in a day, how can I not make that work? What was I doing with my time? Sure, I watch Netflix just as much anyone else – that’s the time I don’t have to think about anything. However, just how does the time spent watching Netflix add up and what I am looking to feel? A busy mums plan to overcome obstacles and still wear her cape at the end of the day seemed impossible.
Now, I enter into this next part with extreme caution. I am going to let you in on a behind the scenes visualization of how much goes on between my three kiddos and this family. This is in no way to brag or make you feel less than because you only have one kiddo and I have three. You can be this busy with no kids honestly. Let me say that louder for the wallflowers in the back – you can be this busy just as a woman!
So here is the deal. I have three daughters. All have different personalities and all love to stay moving. My oldest wants to dance professionally; so you can imagine how many hours we spend at the dance studio in a week. My next kiddo also has a strong passion for dance, but I think she will soon burst out of her shell for performance in general – she wants to be in NYC. My youngest is a spitfire. She knows what she wants, when, and how; you will never change her mind and I am proud she too will carry forward the badass vibe. My husband works 12 hour days 5-6 days a week, he loves his job and wouldn’t trade it for anything.
Then, there is me; I started working at home due to the pandemic and realized that wasn’t going to change – so I made a huge decision without a safety net and started my own business. I was a busy mum planning and pouring my heart and soul into, still do, praying that this is the plan that will work for our family. My passion and heart is with this business that I have built. I created brand foundations, a logo, a website, and then I even starting creating products and a membership space. How in the heck did I do it all? Well, it sure wasn’t alone! However, even with the best laid plans and support you can still feel trapped into a schedule. Having a way to plan as a busy mum was so important to me.
Busy mums plan pretty much everything even down to drive time, I’m not joking. We spend one hour each way commuting to dance classes. So, if we make them all – that is 8 hours a week in driving time. Then of course with two kiddos in dance that means different class schedules. According to my calculations I spend approximately 20.5 hours sitting in the parking lot per week waiting on them. That time also doesn’t reflect the hours they put in working on their solos for competitions. After that you have to add in homework, projects, and reading assignments. I even have to remember what day of the week they wear a uniform vs wearing jeans – no holes of course, since the stores seem to be selling them ONLY full of rips and holes.
You see, if I add up the time I spent driving my kiddos to and from activities, waiting in the parking lot, working on homework and completing projects; I’ve already clocked in a 40hr work week without even adding in my job. That’s right, I said “job” not “hobby”. Some may think coaching is a hobby, I mean I guess thats perfectly understandable considering we live in a time where anyone can go on YouTube and claim to be a doctor. However, let me assure you I have credentials to back up this so called “hobby”.
Now, of course there is my business. (Not hobby, just in case you forgot) I have scheduled myself 25 official working hours per week, solely dedicated to my business. That brings me up to a total of 65hrs per week strictly doing what has to be done. Then not forgotten, personal life steps in again with meal planning and prep – you must feed the tiny humans who live with you. Bath time. Brush your teeth time. Chore time, which they clearly need full instruction on during the actual completion of chores. Bed time. I will be generous and round up to 70hrs per week now, doing things that are nonnegotiable.
Did you know that busy mums plan to add in time to sleep as well? If I average 7hrs of sleep per night, I’m logging another 49hrs to my tally. There are 168hrs in one week. I have just accounted for 119 of those hours. That leaves me hanging with 49hrs left to work with. (Again, that is being generous considering cooking and cleaning take longer than usual and I didn’t even talk about the laundry.)
Okay, lets breathe. PHEW! It’s obvious I meet the criteria of planning my day as a busy mum. I have easily just made a case for myself to prove how I just “don’t have enough time”. See how easy that was? Or was it? I technically have time leftover, even for watching Netflix if you think about it. Score! Fun fact: I am a diehard Survivor fan…and Survivor Australia.
It’s time to start time blocking. If busy mums plan in the sweet spot of planning, this could be life changing. It can seem silly at first, but let me tell you – it is slowly transitioning my attitude from “I don’t have enough time” to simply “I am enough, I want the time”. For the first time in a long time, I put myself at the forefront saying “If I am not my best self, how can I be at my best for others?”. We ultimately must take care of our needs and know instinctively what feels right and accept what works for us. It may be different than what woks for someone else and that is okay!
Let’s do this!
Analyze your week ahead and take note of what you know needs to be done and what you would like to accomplish. You know you will have to block the time for non-negotiable things such as work and extracurricular activities the kiddos are committed to.
From here, you want to see what you didn’t include on the list; for example: laundry and meal prep. The things we have to do but don’t naturally allocate time for. Once you have all the items listed you can then determine which can be done simultaneously or in the same chunk of time. I can technically do laundry and meal prep in the same chunk of time. I have to load the washer, then wait; during that time I can do another task. When our brain feels a sense of direction and knows what’s coming, we instinctively feel more organized.
My time blocks are structured in a way that suits my lifestyle. I am a night owl. Spending my nights working on content creation, writing, and client follow-up notes is the perfect time for me to focus on this. I stay up late, it’s not unusual for me to be up until 1am working. Sleep is also a priority. In our house, we have designated dad as the person who gets people up and ready for school and daycare (I know its unheard of right…not here!). I admittedly sleep in longer than anyone else in the house and don’t feel any guilt about it either. We are all one unit, we all will sacrifices and find what works for us as a whole.
So here is the busy mums plan I follow, broken down into action items (who doesn’t love a good to-do list?):
- List all tasks that you will need to complete for the week, include everything.
- List next to the task the general time of day you would ideally like to work on that task.
- Put multiple tasks together that make sense and can share the same time block.
- Set a realistic time block length for each set of items.
- Put pen to paper and list out how you want your day to flow, you can also add up your hours like I did above in the article to really shine light on just how much time we have leftover.
Lastly, I want to reassure you that I watch Netflix just like everyone else, spontaneously have a day where I do nothing on the list, accept sick days when they come about, and always try to honor the time that I need for myself to function as a human, wife, mother, and business owner. Time blocking your schedule allows you more freedom to do things as you want, but keeps you on task like you need. You can trade out blocks of time as well, so if there is a day that you need to rest- you should always honor that in the most guilt free way. Remember, “I am enough, I want the time”.
X-Christina
